No: a one-syllable word that has an easy-to-understand meaning, and is used to give a negative response.

For example, “No, I don’t want to have another slice of pizza” or “No, I’d rather not go out tonight. I think I’ll stay inside.” Sounds like a pretty easy word to understand, right? Yet, there are still so many people out there who are struggling to grasp the concept of the word, thinking rather it being a rejection of an idea, it is an incentive to try to push harder to persuade you to do something that you clearly do not want to do.

As it is clearly stated in the definition, it is a rejection – a dismissal of an idea or a concept. Nowhere in the word does it mean try harder to convince someone of doing a certain thing. No does not mean that “I secretly mean yes and am trying to act coy or to come off as hard to get,” nor does it mean that “I’m rude,” “I’m nasty” or “I’m not fun.” No does not mean anything other than what comes out of my mouth – no.

If little children are able to grasp this concept, even dogs, why is it so hard for some adults to do the same thing?

This is a struggle that not only women, but also men have been forced to deal with in their everyday lives. How many times will we be put into a situation where our words are not valued, where people see our words as a sign of potential conquest in order to make us succumb to their will? This issue is evident when people try so hard to convince us of going in a certain direction or acting in a certain way when it is so very clear that we don’t want to take part in a certain activity—or have given you so many reasons as to why you should drop the conversation.

This isn’t a reflection on my time here at Iona, but instead a brief commentary on a multitude of experiences that I, and many others I’m sure of, have dealt with. When we say no, we expect that our words should be respected. There shouldn’t be any reason to push us to change our mind or try to guilt us for feeling a certain way.

Not everyone is going to feel the same way as you, or going to be so easy to manipulate into doing what you say—no matter the incentive—and that should be respected. We are individuals who have our own opinions and backgrounds that should be taken into consideration when you try to force us into doing something. It’s easy as that! However, this also doesn’t mean that you should deter from asking us to do things. Of course, we are more than happy to be asked to join certain activities but remember that if we say no, it should be accepted and be able to move on from that.

This is something that I believe that everyone can learn from. Whether it is something that you’ve experienced or have noticed yourself doing it, we can all take note of this and apply it to our everyday lives.

When someone says no, it should be respected.

There is no need to try to constantly try to persuade someone into changing their mind or even manipulate them into feeling guilty for feeling a certain way. Respect their decision and move on.