In less than a week, I will officially be halfway through my college career. What better way to express my happiness for (almost the end of) sophomore year than through the wonderful prose of poetry? Note: I am not a professional poet and may or may not be using a rhyming dictionary to make this work. You have been warned.

A paper due every week,

Skimming reading assignments when

Sparknotes cannot give me a peek.

Sleeping through two alarms

Almost every morning,

I swear that neither of them

Ever rang at all—there should be a warning

Label on the snooze button.

Becoming immune to coffee,

ABC Family movies distracting and adding

To my procrastinating hobby.

Broken hearts, missed calls

Forgetting dates and no longer caring,

I swear I’m not Speechless anymore.

Memorizing lines, stage fright

And slapping boys,

Finding reasons to be pretty on opening night.

Midnight shows and freaking out,

That’s our childhood projected onto the silver screen,

Magic and wizards is what it’s all about.

Days in Pictures and origami cranes,

Monopoly destroying friendships—

The two three complains

Of buying way too many hotels.

Nation, I am Wrist Strong because

This is the Way I Am;

Wait, Am I Making All the Right Moves?

Come on, Skinny Love, the skyline

From the Brooklyn Bridge has never looked better

For Patricians like you and me.

(There are no secrets, only surprises).

ICHP can throw a formal,

Allons-y! to the 5:30 train to see Stetsons.

Stetsons are cool;

Pulling out mandrakes, but we’ll be

Keeping all that Taboo.

So, here’s the halfway mark for a long tale,

I may not know much, but of this I am certain,

This is certainly not a #gaelfail.