Whatever happened to walking into a diner and meeting the love of your life, or looking up from your laptop to see an infatuated somebody looking back? More importantly, whatever happened to respect in intimacy? The world’s population is nearing 8 billion, and yet people need algorithms to make friends and find love. 

The fall and winter months are nicknamed cuffing season because those are times in which people ditch their summer flings and settle down with a “special someone.” It is safe to say that love is in the air because it is October which means cuffing season has just begun. However, is that really love in the air, or is it some superficial disastrous version of love?  

Think about how many people use dating apps to find the one—depending on the person, “the one” refers to various things. Generally speaking, “the one” typically refers to someone who is good looking and “down for anything.” That is not to say that there aren’t people looking for something more serious and meaningful.  

According to Comparecamp.com, in 2020, “39% of Americans use dating apps to have something fun to do.” 29% use the apps out of curiosity, and a deceivingly low 23% use it for casual hook ups. 7% use dating apps to cheat on their significant other. But there is still hope in sight because 49% of users are looking to be in exclusive romantic relationships. That last statistic proposes a question: what is a romantic relationship in 2022?  

In 2022, dating apps dominate the romantic world. Comparecamp.com “predicts a user base of 35.4 million paying and non-paying users for [dating] apps by 2024.” That means by 2024, 35.4 million people’s love life will be dictated by a dating app. People will choose their partners based on photos and one-line captions. Love is certainly not what it used to be. 

Many believe that dating apps promote a superficial love, but this does not stop people from using them. Dating apps are easy and don’t require much from users—all users have to do is judge others. Dating apps are not a true simulation of love and life. You do not get to choose the people that walk into your life in the physical world. Dating apps like other social media apps make you feel powerful and in control of others. You get to virtually choose the things you are exposed to and the people you “meet.” In no way, shape or form is that true in the real world. Yet because most people spend so much time on these apps, those feelings of omnipotence can carry them away. Instead of using these dating apps to find authentic love, people start to disrespectfully judge and reject others based on surface level things.  

Love can be disappointing at times and even more so on dating apps. Comparecamp.com says “40% of female online daters say it’s difficult to find other online daters who were looking for the same kind of relationship.” “61% of men who’ve used online dating in the past five years say that they don’t receive enough messages from the people they’re interested in.” Some happy couples come out of these dating apps, and that is great, but most people on these apps are left with more questions than answers. Questions like, what am I doing wrong? 

These are desperate times for those looking for love, and dating apps are proof of this. Here is to hoping for the revival of authentic love on and off of dating apps. Best of luck this cuffing season.  

55 Online Dating Statistics: 2020/2021 Market Share, Dangers & Benefits | CompareCamp.com