Picture this: The date is Jan. 1, and as you casually scroll through Twitter you come across a tweet that reads, “New Year, New Me!” You scoff, dismissing the post and continuing down your news feed. This may seem spiteful, but it’s the initial reaction many of us have to the phrase that appears, without fault, every New Year – at least I know it is for me.

Is it possible to become a “new” person? I don’t think it is, and that’s why I’ve always had a problem with this phrase. Don’t get me wrong, even though I’m not fond of these four words, I understand their significance. They represent self-improvement, they stand for growth and progression, and they are the force behind each individual’s desire to form New Year’s resolutions. Believe me, I’m all for it, but I don’t think they adequately depict the message that is intended to be conveyed.

If I were to become a “new” person, I would be abandoning who I once was. The phrase insinuates that I must transform, experience what seems to be a metamorphosis in order to self-improve. To achieve betterment I must leave behind my past and all of those unique experiences and memories that make me who I am. As individuals we spend so much time trying to find ourselves, trying to accept and love who we are, and now, in pursuance of self-improvement, we must completely change?

This is why for many people, New Year’s resolutions are unattainable. They make them and fail to keep them, because there’s this notion that they must be perfect in their pursuit of them. They’re now “new” people, which means that there is no room for the same nonessential mistakes. Rather than learning how to become a better version of themselves, individuals put pressure on themselves to change entirely.

Take this example – you decide that this year you want to start eating healthier. No more Ferrero Rocher chocolates before bed and Vanilla Bean Frappuccinos from Starbucks. The first few days of the New Year have gone well. You’ve been able to avoid your cravings and eat healthy. But Friday rolls around, and you’ve had a rough day. You could really go for a Vanilla Bean Frappuccino, but you can’t. This is the “new” you, and the “new” you doesn’t drink those anymore.

Do you see the problem here? There’s no need to become “new.” Why not just become better? Maybe you shouldn’t have the Vanilla Bean Frappuccino every day, but if you want one on a Friday evening, after a long, stressful day of classes you should have one. Even if you just wanted one for no apparent reason, having one Vanilla Bean Frappuccino a week rather than one every day is a huge improvement.

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My point is that self-improvement shouldn’t be correlated with this idea of becoming a new person. Self-improvement is about improving who you are at this very present moment, and if you’re someone who loves Vanilla Bean Frappuccinos, why get rid of them? We shouldn’t focus on becoming new, but becoming better.

For this very reason, I’ve decided that “New Year, New Me” isn’t the appropriate phrase to commemorate the New Year. “New Year, Better Me” is more suitable. If people were to take the phrase “New Year, Better Me” into account rather than “New Year, New Me,” their resolutions would feel less unrealistic and unfeasible, and more pragmatic and genuine.

We shouldn’t abandon who we are entirely. Even though we aren’t perfect and enjoy eating one too many Ferrero Rocher chocolates before bed, this doesn’t mean that there’s something wrong with us – it’s just a reminder that we’re human and that there’s always room for self-improvement. As my mother always says, “I wouldn’t change a thing if you paid me.”